Is Fear Your Pimp?
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Is Fear your Pimp?

As a woman you have the Power to determine who you will let into ear and ultimately into your heart. However most women allow fear to pimp their emotions, values and actions.

Fear has a clear purpose. It is designed to keep you safe from harm and danger. However when it comes to relationships you may not necessary fear for your life, rather you may fear loneliness, intimacy, being abandoned or smothered. No matter what fears you may have regarding relationships; fear prevents you from having a healthy relationship and can cause you to fall into the traps of unhealthy relationships and become victimized by the wrong type of men.

Fear cause women to do stupid things like go on dates, get into a relationships and have sex with men that are not a good contender and have no desire to commit to them. But because you may be afraid of being alone and you don’t think another man will come along – you settle for his nonsense. Not only do you settle but you tip toe around him, hiding who you really are by allowing your timid and boring representative to date him – in the meanwhile the fierce authentic vivacious women within you stands on the sidelines watching and hoping he won’t abandon you.

Men are not exactly stupid now-a-days, they know exactly what a woman needs to hear to allow him to pop the lid off of the cookie jar. Men know that he has to win over your trust through his words and actions within 90 days or less, which is not a difficult task if you are operating from a place a fear. So what does he do?

Often times men will tell you a sad sob story that gets you emotionally attached quickly like he’s been used and abused by many women and he’s afraid of committing until he finds a woman who he can trust. And there you go – the super-love hero breaking your back to prove to him that you are a trustworthy and his ride or die chick – without checking out his story or asking any questions.

On the other hand some men say stuff like “sex is really NOT important,” – REALLY DUDE? But that’s not your reaction, rather you fall for this lie and now you are in his rotation!   YES ROTATION! While he is patiently waiting for your 90 days to be up, his other chick’s 90 days are already up. But you are completely naïve to this fact – so you eventually reward him with sex, simply because he patiently waited for it.

Worst yet!  Men know that most women want to hear the magical word, “I love you,” or tells you “You’re his Girl. ” And what do most women do, they become putty in his hands and bed. I have said in my book, “Successful Women Date Differently,” over and over again – STOP listening to his words and watch his actions. If he says that you’re his woman but he’s not making any future plans, introducing you into his circle, taking you OUT in public on dates or if he is not consistent in the relationship – WAKE UP and Move ON and stop having sex because you are afraid that he will get it from another woman.

When fear governs your relationship you share to much too soon and miss a lot of red blaring flags that indicates that he does not align with your core values, you are not compatible and he is NOT your Mr. Right. The “dating process” is the time to have fun, be authentic – and allow the relationship to unfold naturally and grow. When you share too much to soon you make it easy for a player to adjust his game and play you.

If you want to truly attract and keep your Mr. Right, you must eliminate the fears that keep you in imprisoned, repeatedly dating the wrong type of men and learn how to date differently, show up as authentic in a way that will cause a man to pay attention because you are a special type of woman.

To learn more about how to breakthrough your fears and attract the love you deserve, check out my Love Mastery Group Coaching Program, it’s starting soon and we’ll be learning how to breakthrough fears. This program is designed to support you in transforming internally, activating your femininity power and increasing your confidence in a way that the man you attract into your life reflects back to you, your true authenticity, value and beauty and feel inspire to connect, love and commit to you. – Giving you the love you deserve!

I wish you love!

Your Girl – The Healthy Love Coach

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